February 28, 2008
I'm not gonna lie; I picture my dad driving her in heaven
It only makes sense that my Sentra would go out in style. None of this weepy not turning over in the driveway because it’s cold out crap that so many lesser cars pull. Instead she waited until rush hour traffic ran ragged through the streets and only then did she give up the ghost. Kaput. She offered no warning, unless in your world squeaky brakes and a hissing tire and a steady bucking motion constitute a warning. She did not pull over in defeat. Instead, she opted for more of a Norma Desmond, hand-to-head diva-like swoon, blacking out in the middle of a main DC thoroughfare, her blinking hazards the only sign of the spark once within.

I am now driving a rental car, one whose design screams "My driver is homely!" and "I once paid a women for sex!" I like that it tells me the outside temperature, but it doesn't feel quite right that all of its windows are intact.


21 Comments:

Blogger WildbillthePirate said...

Our Cars are, for the most part, out living Rooms except that you never remember to vacuum under the seats or put plastic down to prevent stains (unless you wn a dog). Sorry about you having car trouble, Me too! At least I have a fall-back vehicle for the short term, One reliable enough to be counted on.

Blogger Sizzle said...

So you're not driving a rental PT Cruiser?

Blogger Eric said...

I rode a bike to work with two flat tires. Two. It could be worse is all I'm saying.

Blogger KB said...

I'm so sorry, my dear. What are you going to get now?

Blogger Reid said...

Hm. Cars. See, that's why I don't touch the things.

Blogger Snakebite said...

Yeah, lose the car. You'll be glad you did.

Blogger JoJo said...

Ah Kris...I feel your pain. It was just last July when my trusty Isuzu died the death. It just doesn't seem right that the Prius runs so quietly and obediently and without any drama. A little dull, really.

I do have warn you that car shopping is akin to the worst blind date you'd ever experienced - teeth gnashingly frustrating, uncomfortable and can easily bring a sane woman to want to kill with blunt, dull objects.

Blogger Anastacia said...

AAAAHAH!

*cough*

Sorry.

AAAAHAHAHA!

That car is AWFUL. I'm sorry, but as BFF there are things I have to say and this is it. On the plus side, Peter Saarsgaard In A Box would fit much more comfortably in the Retiree-Mobile than under your bed.

Just saying.

And as much as I would have liked to know R. Likey, given that the amount of your sass MUST be genetic, I have to imagine him pointing at you, Sentra, you, Sentra, and, aghast, shouting, "Krismass Willma Likey, I am not driving something with a piece of cardboard for a window!"

I don't know. I just think that he wouldn't stand for it.

I am sorry you had to walk home, though. Seriously? SERIOUSLY! You walked? Your ass must now double as a walnut cracker. Or nut cracker. Maybe a Ritz Cracker.

I don't know, lay off. I've just finished my 3d glass of Cab. What? YOU DON'T KNOW ME.

And get rid of this effing google-only bullshiz, for the love of Cat Stevens.

Blogger Melliferous Pants said...

the last time I rented a car it was a PT Cruiser. I felt like such a tool. PT's are the gateway car to minivans.

Blogger Sturdy Girl said...

At least it was quick and she didn't suffer

Blogger JordanBaker said...

Oh no. RIP, Sentra.

I still remember when we had to put down my '86 Mazda. It started making horrifying screams every time it turned a corner. Then I graduated to the '96 Saturn, which my sister murdered long before its time.

Blogger Paige Jennifer said...

If you want, I'd be happy to pass through DC, smash out the back window of your rental and tape it up with a For Sale sign so it feels more like your old car.

RIP Sentra.

Blogger Jenny said...

that really sucks. i'm sorry.

Blogger HKW said...

You find humor in everything! Bummer.

Splurge for one of those cool new 2-door Altimas. Oh! I know! Get a mini-Cooper! And become a spy!

Blogger Gwen said...

As long as it doesn't yell, "I give myself perms!" and "Caution! Children on Board!" Because the car I OWN totally does that, and it ain't pretty.

Blogger kris said...

Gwenny Gwen, if it says anything about "Ogilvie" I'm not sure we can be friends.

Blogger Ashley said...

RIP sentra. though from the sounds of it, it seems it was time. what are you going to buy??

Blogger Melina said...

At least you don't drive a horrible Neon as I do, it's a cold comfort I know...but it is a comfort. Have pity on me though, I don't really drive anywhere so I don't get a choice in a nice car when it come down to budget in this house.

Blogger Neil said...

Boys make passes at girls in rental cars.

Blogger deeeeeetroit said...

Don't look at it as the death of a Sentra, those pains may never leave you. Look at it more like you get to drive around in a super sassy HHR. Now that says sexy!!!!

Blogger John said...

you make it sound like paying for sex is bad!

when you get a new car you can make all kinds of impossible-to-keep rules like "No Eating in the Car" and "I'm Going to Wash and Wax My Car Every Saturday Morning at 7am" just to keep it new.

Post a Comment

<< Home

footer