April 26, 2007
roughly 30 of your Google searches that let me know i'm clearly not the sass attack i thought i was
headgear braces
wino blog thirtysomething cats
bowling with your bum
fannie packs
if i'm too good for him, how come i'm not with him?
gross woman
wayward wino
fang mouth guards
song while elaine dances seinfeld
girls wearing maxi pads
expired robitussin
nightly wine weight
vibrator recomendations
hope for a broken heart post break-up, where's god in all of this?
spaghettios weight watchers points
i'm not so attractive
hpv insurance rejection
blogger diet
mom in pantyhose
anne geddes baby biscuit
picture of bea arthur in her 20s
ass smell girl
i'm in sixth grade how to flirt
girls and sausage pizza
i pick my thong wedgies
don't eat curry before a blowjob
fear of self flushing toilets
person farting jingle bells on the toilet video
cellulite on my calves
i put tampons in my bum
then again, at least I'm not this Google searcher:

im a girl and i want to know how to have sex with animals
who probably also wanted a bit of information about a topic I'll admit I go on about to excess:

unitard girls sex

ho hum. i guess i'll just stick with the stuff that keeps you guys coming back.

pictures of stretch marks after using emu oil adult acne like boil on tummy


Blogger playfulinnc said...

You've outed me, Kris. I thought our search engine scavenger hunts were just between us winos!

Oh well, you win with bea arthur. How could I top that?

Blogger Mel said...

Clearly, I'm impressed with the "vibrator recomendations" search string :)

Rock star!

Anonymous sween said...

If I didn't already have a name for my site, I'd go with "ass smell girl" IN A HEARTBEAT.

Blogger I-66 said...

Wait. Am I not supposed to eat curry before I get head? Or is she not supposed to eat it before she gives?

Blogger Reid said...

Good Lord...that list is one of the bizarre reads ever.

Blogger JordanBaker said...

If it were "bowling with a bum" instead of "bowling with your bum," it might make an interesting reality TV show.

Anonymous Alison said...

I need to go look at my search strings. It's been too long. That said, I bet I can't top your list.

Blogger brookem said...

LOL wow. ha. holy hell some peopel are real nuts.

Blogger t2ed said...

If you could get vibrator recomendations up higher on your list, you'd get a LOT more traffic.

But stranger comments.

It could be worse, I'm the #1 hit if you search for dork parent.

Blogger Paige Jennifer said...

My most recent search result:

bikini wax in beaumont, tx

For the record, I have had a bikini wax AND I have visited Beaumont, Texas but I've never once combined those two wretched activities. Why would anyone want to do such a terrible thing?

Blogger Jo said...

Out of all of those, this one made me laugh out loud:

don't eat curry before a blowjob

Who googles this stuff?

Blogger Peter DeWolf said...

vibrator recomendations

And, I'm not going to lie, I was more than a little disappointed when I arrived.

Blogger Tracy Lynn said...

Person farting jingle bells on toilet. Video, no less.

And here I thought I was interesting with Homemade Ass Shaped Cake. Clearly, I'm an amateur.

Blogger Kim said...

Just think, if it weren't for that 'i put tampons in my bum' search, we would have never met...

Blogger Miss Scarlet said...

WOW. I mean...wow. I thought I had some good ones, but these are just great.

Blogger whiskeymarie said...

Hey Judgy McJudgester-
If there was nothing else to drink in the house, you too would want to know if your expired robitussin would kill you.

Or not, as it turns out.
They should warn you about the explosive diarrea, though.

Blogger janet said...

there's nothing like reading your google search referrals to make you question your readership, and then question your self.

Blogger Marissa said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Absolutely, downright hilarious. My favorite is 'i put tampons in my bum'. I mean, everyone does that. Right?

Blogger Jorge said...

I never once thought that ALL of my searches would make it though.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

expired robitussin

This one tickled me more than the others, and I have no idea why. It's one thing to use the anonymous internet to search for sexual stuff, but expired Robitussin is a pretty cut-and-dry subject, I would think.

Blogger Kelly said...

What are the Weight Watchers points for spaghettios?

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Omg, thank you for posting those. I laughed harder than I have in a really long time.

Some of my cool ones include "freaky granny sex" and "sex with hamsters."

Blogger Amy said...

your search strings are ever so much more interesting than mine *sigh*

I'm a jealous hater....


Blogger Maurey Pierce said...

Good stuff. I'm currently #1 on Google for "Dennis Kucinich's trophy wife."

Blogger kristen said...

like kelly, i wonder what the
"spaghettios weight watchers points" person found. WOW.

just WOW.

and...you seem to say the word bum a lot?!?!

Blogger lisa q. said...

OMG that's funny and scary all at the same time...thanks for the belly laugh!

Blogger thethinker said...

Stretch marks.. acne... sex with animals?

I think I lost my appetite, and I was REALLY hungry before I read this list.

Blogger tallglassofvino said...

about the curry.... good to know... good to know....

Blogger Rasberry said...

I had a reader that found me through a search regarding granola and hot pants...??? You totally are the sass attack. Don't kid yourself.

Blogger Christine said...

Curious...how can you find out what people are searching for when they come across your blog? BTW good stuff on here :)

Blogger missbhavens said...

expired robitussin? Now THERE'S a stumper.

A made a couple of vieos with the titles "porn/art"

You can imagine where THAT landed me in the seach results department!

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