March 3, 2006
Day 1: How to entertain a fellow blogger
I’m learning quickly. I think it helps if you ensure that she has something to eat before you pick her up from the airport, considering that she had already had three glasses of God’s nectar prior to getting into my Sentra (for which I bought new hubcaps yesterday, simply because the thought of any guest actually seeing the one black eye on both sides of my vehicle made the part of me that is my mother cringe.)

A splash of top-shelf margarita and some Will-Farrell-doing-Harry-Carrey impersonations cannot hurt.

Allow Cricket to perform her slightly uncomfortable sexual antics by rolling around on the carpet, exposing her white tummy and constant need for attention.

Turn off the heat in the bedroom, allowing the temp to plummet to a Jurgen-comfortable 61 degrees.

Did I mention the equal parts Absolut Vanil and fully-caffeinated Diet Coke thing? That works too.

Fight her and win for sleeping on the couch rights, but only after the two of you verbally assault innocent and sober fellow blogger Maliavale via cell.

Leave her nestled in the king bed as you attempt to find clothes that you didn’t already wear this week.

Rinse. Lather. And prepare to repeat.

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26 Comments:

Blogger Keith said...

Ha - sounds like you two are having fun!

Blogger Finn said...

Have fun and play nice ladies! I want to know more about the Absolut Vanil and Diet Coke - thumbs up or down? I like a little Captain in my Diet Coke myself.

Blogger Bill said...

Good grief! 61 degrees? That's 16 Celcius! I'd have told her to hit the road. She sounds like my sister.

What kind of unnatural barbarian have you allowed into your home?

Blogger Dave said...

At first I though Jurgen was the one performing uncomfortable sexual antics and exposing her white tummy. Okay, maybe I wanted it to be that way.

Blogger MKD said...

Take pictures. Or Video. I'm cool with either.

Blogger Thérèse said...

Sounds like a lot of fun to ME! Recipe for success, indeedy!

Blogger missbhavens said...

61 degrees? What is she, a penguin?

Have fun!

Blogger TrappedInColorado said...

New visitor to your blog... very cryptic post... intriguing... will have to read all previous posts to see what the heck... Straight Level vodka, shaken, dry, up, olives...

My thermostat is set to 52 at night.

Peace

Blogger Miss Scarlet said...

61 degrees? Aw, sounds like my old apartment.

Blogger Maliavale said...

I think my favorite part of that phone call was the French pronounciation of "asswipe." Or perhaps it was the fact that JN was genuinely surprised to discover that we, indeed, did talk on the phone last night.

Blogger Carolyn said...

"HEEYY! My friends call me whiskers cuz I'm curious, like a cat!" I love Will Farrell doing Harry Carrey.

Sounds like you guys are having a blast.

Blogger Melliferous Pants said...

Fun! I heart fun!

Blogger Jasclo said...

HA! Vanilla vodka and Diet Coke? Holy shit. Don't drink it all till I get there. :)

Anonymous nabbalicious said...

Y'all better be wearing your party pants tomorrow night! I am READY. TO. GO.

Anonymous Jorge said...

Nabbalicious - I have this image of giant, baggy, rainbow-coloured pants. I don't know why.

Mama - You're setting the bar here. If none of these things on the list happen when Canada comes to DC I'll cry.

J

Blogger babyjewels said...

I think we need an audio blog of the interpretations. Have fun.

Blogger Megarita said...

Hostess with the MOSTEST!

Blogger Bridget Jones said...

Wow thanks for the recipe!! So THAT's how you spell margarita! Thanks Kris!

61 degrees? Holy crap that's cold. Brrrr and I live in the GWN!!!

Glad you guys are having fun....keep up the great work!!

Blogger nursevl said...

Just leafing through your blog, and "i likey!"
Funny, and appropriate!

Anonymous sandra said...

caffeine and alcohol...sounds good to me!

Blogger Cheryl said...

Sounds like a pretty good time!

Blogger LBseahag said...

any liquor makes diet coke bearable...

thanks for the idea!

I miss bug...

Blogger Heather B. said...

How to entertain a fellow blogger:

Get her drunk
make lewd comments upon first meeting her
Oh, you could touch her boob and maybe stick your finger in her ear.

I've only *heard* that these things work. Only after such things would said blogger become absolutely smitten with you.

Blogger Kim said...

I can't believe you biatches went ahead and had a good time without me.

Hmpf.

Blogger jennster said...

LOL- awesome!!!!

Anonymous diyetler said...

Hhaha funny :P

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