February 18, 2006
Don't need no hateration in this dancery
I'm not a big fan of Internet hate.

But Kris, you say, you hate all the time! As is evidenced by this entry and this post and this little number.

Semantics, I know. But here's my explanation.

To Hate On: (origin: Kris Likey) What Kris does. Making fun of, calling out, or ridiculing individuals of unspecified origin who cannot be identified via CSI-like Super Glue latent printing or basic context clues. Intended for your fun only (only, only . . .) Use: I hate on when that parking attendant gives me the wrong change.

To Hate: (origin: Dawn, reportedly of Time) With malintent, making fun of, calling out, ridiculing or otherwise causing targeted recipient(s) to experience embarrassment, dropping of computer-side booze, or gastrointestinal distress IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE BLOGOSPHERE. Use: What the hell, Paul of CMI Parking Booth #5491 in Adams Morgan??? Your mom probably wishes you were never born. Don't they teach your people to count?

insert appropriate crickets here.

I'm sick of it. In the past several weeks alone, I have come across several incidents of this. Writers, do you have no blog fodder other than personal attacks on others? Surely Blogger has a template you can use to cure this.

Quite a few attacks have been anonymous, and quite frankly, I cannot imagine anything more cowardly (with the clear exception of suicide bombing. Suicide bombing usually takes the cake, except when no one dies but the suicide bomber. Then this is still clearly worse.)

It amazes me just how many readers claim to find this entertaining. Who are these people? And who has sex with them? I don't think I know any, but I'm pretty sure these are the same kids who still find joy in knocking people over via the back of the knee tap. NO. NOT HILARIOUS IN THE 8th GRADE.

AND STILL NOT GAINING HILARITY.

So do everyone a favor. Talk about people away from the dinner table just like we do in all of our civilized families. Or if you're going to choose the path of public ridicule, at least take the napkin off your face.





These views do not represent the views of Bug, Cricket, or Kris' exceptionally talented blog friends.

Labels:



53 Comments:

Blogger Marissa said...

couldn't agree with you more!!! well said - VERY well said!

Anonymous Jennifer said...

And with this one entry, I'm officially "your people".

Bless your heart.

And for good measure?

A-effin-men.

Blogger K said...

Yup, the birth of cyber-bullying... It's not just for school yard thugs anymore. Yeesh.

Blogger Candace said...
Blogger playfulinnc said...

Oh, yes...but there are some that say that all blogging is passive agressive.

Well, at least my boss who reads my blog against my will just looking for something to be down on me about because she is too afraid to actually care but likes to pretend like she does...

Oh. I think that's what you're talking about.

Cheers.

Blogger Bill said...

Years ago I read a book called "The Psychology of the Internet" and much of what it said still holds true. I think a lot of "hate" has to do with the anonymity of the Internet. "No one knows who I really am, so I can say anything."

There's definitely a culture of hate out there but what's really interesting is that most of the people posting that kind of stuff really are ... well, there's no kind way of saying it - losers. Losers from the point of view they aren't people you would ever want to know in the real world.

One of the reasons I use my actual name (Bill) and a real picture of myself is as a kind of token gesture of truthfulness, even though I know it's kind of bullshit. I'm still largely anonymous. Buut at least it's a gesture.

I sometimes write posts, more often comments, that are knee-jerk responses to things and they have some of that cranky asshole quality to them and I almost always regret it afterwards. I'm surprised the blogosphere isn't bulging with my apologies.

For me, there are two main things wrong with hating in public: 1) you're boring and, 2) you're missing all the good stuff.

Blogger Shawn said...

Wait...does this mean I can't hate Tom Cruise anymore? Or, can I still hate on him if I keep it to myself? I mean, the guy did knock up the girl of my dreams... And need I remind anyone that he's making another Mission Impossible movie?!?

And while we're on etiquette, which fork do I use first again?

Wow...just like in real life...this being polite stuff is really hard.

Blogger missbhavens said...

I think I've led a sheltered bloggy life. Yesterday was actually the very first attack blog I've ever read. Well...not so much an attack blog as a regular one that had a running serialized story of hatey-hate-hate posted. It was pretty shocking (especially because it wasn't nearly as anonymous as it should have been--for legal and safety reasons). More shocking were the 50 comments egging the writer on. I'm figuring they were family.

I don't want to read hatefull things in my spare time, either. I like to come to your blog to read about peace, harmony and little baby duckies and bunnies and rainbows and unicorns!

Oh, you know what I mean.

Hate stinks.

Blogger Keith said...

Who be hatin' in this hizzouse? Don't hate the blogga, hate the playa or the game or something like that.

Blogger Megarita said...

Right on, girly. So weary of the snits that get around. Weak minds got nothing better to do, I say... (the fellow above is absolutely right about the "anonymity" factor, but I've seen plenty of "my name is shitbrick and I hate you" action as well, particularly in this 'burg.)

Blogger Wicked H said...

Why can't we all just get along?

Kris, you tell me who they are...I've got people who can take care of such annoyances.....

Blogger yournamehere said...

Yeah, when I say a guy in line in front of me at Target smelled like someone put limberger cheese in an old work boot, I don't post his picture and personal information.

I've seen a few blogger lover's quarrels go horribly wrong. It gets personal then. It's quite ugly.

Blogger Kris said...

I've seen bloggers have to shut down their sites. Nasty.

I knew someone would find a hole in my reasoning. That would be Tom Cruise. And he is a hole.

Sorry, that would have been an example of Hating.

Blogger Bobby said...

heh, I had a thought provoking comment, and then I read the words Tom Cruise, which makes my mind go blank for a multitude of reasons, none good.

so carry on....

Anonymous Sanora said...

On the flip side, truly loving this post - I also really hate on those f*&(ing commenters who rip you a new one under "anonymous" because they're too much of a girly-man to come out and own it.

Blogger Marcia said...

Best quote of this post? "Who are these people? And who has sex with them?"

I haven't stopped laughing...

Blogger Sizzle said...

i am with marcia. i am still laughing about that.

xoxo
sizz

Blogger mysterygirl! said...

I think writing the hating post is a kind of climax for those people, since, as you suggest, clearly no one else will have sex with them. Or at least only people with low self-esteem will.

Blogger Bridget Jones said...

hmmm wandering coyote had the same issue...hope they all find something else to distract them soon. Maybe Crayola has some new colors coming out...

Anonymous Jorge said...

A lot of people make careers out of hate.
I say to hell with those people.

Tons of people hate me. Almos none of them would ever say so to my face.

Kris.
I love you and your writing.
So do a lot of us here.
That should be enough to counter any hate mail.

And if they ever wish to tell you to your face, let me know.
I'll be there to listen to them run away.

:D

Blogger Rhinestone Cowgirl said...

Wordy, word word.

(I know; not particularly clever, but I just agree completely.)

Blogger Egan said...

Kris, this is a wonderful topic. I blogged about this very thing a couple months back. Some people have a bizarre idea of what is fun. Some bloggers like to pick random blogs and use them as their personal chat room and then they say mean nasty things about them. It's easy to type the walk from home, but karma will get them back.

I knew there's a reason I come back to your site over and over. It's not just because you comment on my blog either. Have a great week.

Blogger Lauren said...

You know we love you, don't let a few vocal and insecure half-wits get you down.

Blogger babyjewels said...

Yes, I've seen it and I don't like it at all. I especially don't care for what egan is referring to. I always think, how would I have felt if it were done to me. I've also had a total jackass who's name I won't mention come to my site and mock me (he does it to MANY people).

Good topic, as always.

Blogger babyjewels said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

Blogger JordanBaker said...

The sort of thing you're talking about is clearly the domain of people who never outgrew the playground dynamic of meanness = power. And they never will (probably because, as you point out, no one will sleep with them, and not getting laid makes people nasty).

Blogger Thérèse said...

I especially enjoy your disclaimer.

We should all use more disclaimers with less discretion. Or is it more discretion? We should all use disclaimers, as much as humanly possible.


____

The views expressed in this comment were intended to confuse.

Anonymous Jurgen Nation said...

Who hated on you? NOT COOL.

I completely agree with you here. Just because you're not actually in front of the person doesn't mean you're exempt from rules of etiquette. I'm not going to stop hating on Tom Cruise, because come on, I'm not Mother Theresa, but personal attacks? Unbelievable. Are you THAT INSECURE about yourself that you have to take it out on others and make them look bad? To use the words of a great, wise friend: "it's just a reflection on them." It still hurts, because hey, you're human, but they're the ones who look like fucking idiots. And everyone knows it. So don't feel bad if anyone hated on you. We'll get revenge.

Blogger LBseahag said...

I hate hate.

Blogger HMP said...

Hi, Kris...I usually don't post on your blog, because everyone else has already done so. However, I actually feel I might have something noteworthy to say:

There are levels of intelligence that are notable in the discussions that people have:

The least evolved talk to things; the educated talk to people; the self-actualized speak of ideas.

You speak of ideas. Just because these ideas involve people, doesn't make you a hater.

Blogger JJ said...

I know exactly what you mean. Bill Wilson of 821 Lexington Dr., Kentston, KY does exactly the same thing and I hate him.

Blogger Pizzle said...

I agree with everything but the 8th Grade Knee Tap thing. That shit still cracks me up.

;)

AMEN. I've seen more than I'd care to written about me in the past week or so. Really nasty things from people who have nothing better to do.

My personal favorites are the ones that include links so EVERYONE! can come and act like an ass.

Blogger Bookhart said...

Ah yes, two of my blogging buddies have gotten some nasty anonymous postings. I'm sure I'm due any moment now. I hope I'll have the fortitude to ignore them and go on. Or post some wonderful entry, as you did.

Anonymous Jacynth said...

Let's take a quick look at the bloggers who blatantly post words of hate on other blogs. They are most likely squealy little people with thick glasses and acne. They have not had anything better than a pot pie because they are ashamed to be seen in public. They play video games endlessly and make virtual friends with the characters. "Did you see Chun Lee's move? Damn! That girl got game", one will say to him/herself. Their parents stay far, far away. They wash their sheets every 3 months. The only human interaction they get is from the late night 7-11 trip to get a grape slurpee, frozen pizza, cheetos and a porno mag. Does this make you feel better?

Blogger Bridget Jones said...

"who has sex with these people?"

Answer: NO ONE! That's why they're so pissed......

ROFL

Blogger Namaste said...

genius.

have recovered from my own tempestuous storm of hating, let me just say, thank you.

and who does have sex with them, anyway?

Blogger Egan said...

Jacynth - you just described me to a tee.

Blogger Angel said...

AMEN sister!

Blogger Lefty said...

Now you tell me!

Blogger Thérèse said...

Kris, I've decided to tell you that you are fabulous.

You? You are fabulous.

I don't know why, but the urge has possessed me just now. Not in the creepy way. I just thought: "Wait! Wait just one cotton-pickin' minute here. Thérèse, have you told Kris how cool she is lately? Or even... ever! Have you EVER told Kris how very Cool you Think she IS?!"

And that's when I realized it. I had used capitalization all wrong, even in my head.

Doesn't make it untrue, though.

Also, I like your olive. It's very green and hairy.

Blogger Kiki said...

Amen sistah!! Hee hee.
There was this backup dancer for the video to that Mary J Blige song that I used to be in love with. He was gorgeous. Off topic, but true.

I've gotten some really nasty hater comments and had to delete them. Do people have nothing better to do with their time?

Blogger dasi said...

But I can hate my boss on my blog just once without getting included in that category, right...? Because I don't USUALLY hate on my blog - but it was either that or wait for my head to explode... Now you have me all paranoid and insecure... ;)

Blogger Krystle said...

Kris,

Absolutely, truly and wonderfully correct...which seems to be a theme on your blog.

I don't think anyone could have said it better. Kudos lady, kudos.

I too have gotten some horribly mean (and obviously time consuming to write) anonymous comments on my blog. I agree--it must just be that no one will have sex with them, it's the only explanation I understand.

Blogger DC Cookie said...

I had a hater for a little while who posted anonymously and made fun of my nose and my "ego." Now THAT was pure comedy, for the sole reason that I am, in person, absolutely and completely un-hateable. I almost felt honoured to have a hater.

Blogger Sandra said...

Anonymous commenters are creeps and cowards. I used to ignore them and leave the comments there...but I delete now. People who come into my nice lil' bloggy "house", crap on my carpet and sneak out - aren't welcome back.

Blogger Egan said...

[fighting back urge to post an anonymous comment, just. can't. do. it]

Anonymous mrsatroxi said...

Do you mean people who leave anonymous nasty-grams in the form of comments on OTHER folks sites, or people who post hateful things on their OWN sites? Or both?

Because (of a few recent venting posts) I'm sure I fall into the latter catergory, and that makes me sad.

Although at least I have never left a spiteful comment (anonymous or otherwise) anywhere. I do receive 'em though, and that makes me sad, too.

Whaaaaaa!

Blogger Bill said...

Every time I drop by here to see what's happening I see that guy screaming maniacally at the fluffy bunny. It's starting to give me the willies.

Blogger Kris said...

I've posted something new. I don't have group insurance, so I wouldn't want to be responsible for anyone getting the willies.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's a great story. Waiting for more. video editing programs

Post a Comment

<< Home

footer